Wednesday, August 24, 2005
Why get attached?
Friends around me are getting into fights with their partners, they are so affected after the fights.
Problems arise because there's not enough time for each other, lack of trust in the relationship and I guess, selfishness, sadly...
Why do people get together when there's absolutly no trust in each other. Why do you have to report to him when you're staying out late? Why do you have to get her permission before attending a party with your buddy? Why do you have to ask him if you can watch movies with your ex-classmates? ain't him/her suppose to trust you with 101% of her/him and allow you to do whatever you want, whenever you like? Is freedom lost when there's love?
Why are people so selfish even with their own selected partner. I've a friend who is recently recommended to spend a semester in a European University for an exchange. He mentioned this great news to his girlfriend as soon as he reached home. Instead of congratulating him & feeling proud of him, they got into a fight. She complained that he's not sparing a thought for their future. He is alone in his progression, while she's stagnant. I thought, why is she so selfish? She's not achieveing much doesn't mean he has to stay with her in her stagnant world. Why isn't she at least feeling happy or proud for him? Isn't it part of her obligations to share his joy?
Recently, friends had been questioning why am I single? Am I too lazy to go find a partner? Or worst, my sexual preference is unique?
My answer? I'm scared. I'm scared I'll lose my freedom. I'm scared I'll not have enough time for her. I'm scared I'm not good enough for her. I'm scared I had not been fair to her. I'm scared...
Well, but some people said, when love's here, nothing can stop you. Maybe my love isn't here yet. Or had I missed it?
Problems arise because there's not enough time for each other, lack of trust in the relationship and I guess, selfishness, sadly...
Why do people get together when there's absolutly no trust in each other. Why do you have to report to him when you're staying out late? Why do you have to get her permission before attending a party with your buddy? Why do you have to ask him if you can watch movies with your ex-classmates? ain't him/her suppose to trust you with 101% of her/him and allow you to do whatever you want, whenever you like? Is freedom lost when there's love?
Why are people so selfish even with their own selected partner. I've a friend who is recently recommended to spend a semester in a European University for an exchange. He mentioned this great news to his girlfriend as soon as he reached home. Instead of congratulating him & feeling proud of him, they got into a fight. She complained that he's not sparing a thought for their future. He is alone in his progression, while she's stagnant. I thought, why is she so selfish? She's not achieveing much doesn't mean he has to stay with her in her stagnant world. Why isn't she at least feeling happy or proud for him? Isn't it part of her obligations to share his joy?
Recently, friends had been questioning why am I single? Am I too lazy to go find a partner? Or worst, my sexual preference is unique?
My answer? I'm scared. I'm scared I'll lose my freedom. I'm scared I'll not have enough time for her. I'm scared I'm not good enough for her. I'm scared I had not been fair to her. I'm scared...
Well, but some people said, when love's here, nothing can stop you. Maybe my love isn't here yet. Or had I missed it?
# posted by Dave Fisherman : 8/24/2005 12:27:00 AM
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came across yr site through huiying's blog.. geez..
in regards to this entry, I feel that trust has to be nurtured over time.. there's no 100% trust right at the beginning, unless the girl is damn confident of herself or just not very serious about r/s anyway. Sometimes, it's not the lack of trust for the other, but the lack of self esteem. I would say, there are indeed pros and cons in being attached, but having experiencing 20 years of singlehood and not being attached, the pros of loving another and being loved definitely weighs off the cons. =)
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in regards to this entry, I feel that trust has to be nurtured over time.. there's no 100% trust right at the beginning, unless the girl is damn confident of herself or just not very serious about r/s anyway. Sometimes, it's not the lack of trust for the other, but the lack of self esteem. I would say, there are indeed pros and cons in being attached, but having experiencing 20 years of singlehood and not being attached, the pros of loving another and being loved definitely weighs off the cons. =)
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